** Sunday, November 28, 2004 __
Currently Feeling*
..
I'm back again. I'm super busy these days. No time for me to online in the day. Firstly, I would like to say is.. My mom accepts him i think. I didn't expect this to happen so fast. I thought I need to plan out some stuff to tell her that I have a BF. Never know that day she saw my phone message(there's a picture appear when a message come), she asked me who was that. I took this opportunity that it was him and all those stuff. She questioned me a little and didn't say much. AND.. just now i even meet dd with her to borrow his digicam. So what does this means? She accepts it? Ya but I suppose to be happy right? After all, I'm not. I'm kinda sad. I don't know wassup with her, she says she don't like christians. Ok. Some other personal reasons. Bla. Don't wanna talk about it. But yay? Dd can come over here freely after 2 long years. =|
I was having a fever past few days. Just recovered. Having cough but yea today I'm perfectly alright. I was worried that I can't find any nice clothes for prom night this coming tuesday. Guess what? My sis asked me to goto Future States in wisma and manage to get some nice stuff. Ok. Yea. So see it on tuesday. Medick called me this evening that if i wanna goto Dong place for some Makeup. NAH. No thanks. So troublesome. Going here and there. Meeting people. I rather stay at home and do all my crap and mom send me straight there. Yea. Hopefully things goes smoothly la.
oh shucks. my sis ask me to teacher her maths! for her QM exam. and itsss... E maths? =| sian. POA also got problem still ask me to teach her. skali teach her wrong how! anyway... c1 and me haven date out yet. and i have to go for a hair appointment this tuesday but I decided not to go cuz my hair is kinda dry now and after washes, it seem that the colour turned a little lighter and a little obvious now. mom asked me not to go too.
oh. 2days ago i accompanied lyncia to city plaza to get her dress refund. never know that the ger who sold her the dress is trying to cheat the shop. she sold the dress to her w/o giving her receipt and even quote her a price which the shop doesnt go that low ($30) and take that money she earn to her pocket. the shop founds out that there's no evidence and receipt when sold and scolded her. that ger is a 18yr old malaysian. they actually wanted to report her to the police but see her very young ah. den let her go. she resign herself. awww. the guy at the shop thank us. we didnt know we helped them actually. its like everything happen so fast and HUh? we get the credit? haha. oh well. i dont know what am i saying actually. -_-.
anyway. blog other time. i dont have the time too. anything just sms me. wont be online much too. yea. bz weeks. bye?
I'm back again. I'm super busy these days. No time for me to online in the day. Firstly, I would like to say is.. My mom accepts him i think. I didn't expect this to happen so fast. I thought I need to plan out some stuff to tell her that I have a BF. Never know that day she saw my phone message(there's a picture appear when a message come), she asked me who was that. I took this opportunity that it was him and all those stuff. She questioned me a little and didn't say much. AND.. just now i even meet dd with her to borrow his digicam. So what does this means? She accepts it? Ya but I suppose to be happy right? After all, I'm not. I'm kinda sad. I don't know wassup with her, she says she don't like christians. Ok. Some other personal reasons. Bla. Don't wanna talk about it. But yay? Dd can come over here freely after 2 long years. =|
I was having a fever past few days. Just recovered. Having cough but yea today I'm perfectly alright. I was worried that I can't find any nice clothes for prom night this coming tuesday. Guess what? My sis asked me to goto Future States in wisma and manage to get some nice stuff. Ok. Yea. So see it on tuesday. Medick called me this evening that if i wanna goto Dong place for some Makeup. NAH. No thanks. So troublesome. Going here and there. Meeting people. I rather stay at home and do all my crap and mom send me straight there. Yea. Hopefully things goes smoothly la.
oh shucks. my sis ask me to teacher her maths! for her QM exam. and itsss... E maths? =| sian. POA also got problem still ask me to teach her. skali teach her wrong how! anyway... c1 and me haven date out yet. and i have to go for a hair appointment this tuesday but I decided not to go cuz my hair is kinda dry now and after washes, it seem that the colour turned a little lighter and a little obvious now. mom asked me not to go too.
oh. 2days ago i accompanied lyncia to city plaza to get her dress refund. never know that the ger who sold her the dress is trying to cheat the shop. she sold the dress to her w/o giving her receipt and even quote her a price which the shop doesnt go that low ($30) and take that money she earn to her pocket. the shop founds out that there's no evidence and receipt when sold and scolded her. that ger is a 18yr old malaysian. they actually wanted to report her to the police but see her very young ah. den let her go. she resign herself. awww. the guy at the shop thank us. we didnt know we helped them actually. its like everything happen so fast and HUh? we get the credit? haha. oh well. i dont know what am i saying actually. -_-.
anyway. blog other time. i dont have the time too. anything just sms me. wont be online much too. yea. bz weeks. bye?
** Monday, November 22, 2004 __
Currently Feeling*
yawn.
Godammit. My hair is so dry now. Sigh. Fever now. I don't know whats wrong. I was feeling so tired and cold this afternoon. I slept and mum told me that I had a fever. Dear also got fever now. Why?! Both of us at the same time. Haha! He's booking out tonight and probably booking in tomorrow unless he extend his MC.
O levels is over. And then again, everything is not over yet. I got lots of activities. I scared I can't handle them man. It's like rushing here and there to different places. Things clash and cancelled. Here and there. Tons of loads of craps. And now I'm feeling sick. I don't feel like doing anything now. Time really flies. I'm afraid that I can't catch up with time.
Yesterday I went to sign in the Chingay Application. Yea. Training starts next month till Feb. I saw the actual day which is on 19th Feb. Time to report is 2pm and everything will finish at 11pm. Oh My god. Almost 12hours. Geesh and somehow they surely will call us in the morning go down for some daimoku for great success of performance. Which means that I'll be busy for more than 12hours.
Currently I'm downloading MapleStory. My friends say that the game is gay. Oh well. I have nothing better to do at home, so download it to kill the time at home right. lol. Yup. This wednesday we gonna have a 'Job Hunting' day. Thursday going for suntanning? Fri? I don't know! I haven't buy graduation night stuff. Saturday kor's BBQ. Sunday.. Crystal ask me to go out with her and emily. Gosh. Please. please please. People out there. Give me a break. I know it's after exams and I have a whole lot of time but hey! I need to rest! Even bernard ask me don't goto that training which clashes on his first chalet day. What the hell. Ended up I have to plan some special plans on that day after the training. Geesh.
O shit. I forgot to tell dd some stuff. Ciaos.!
Godammit. My hair is so dry now. Sigh. Fever now. I don't know whats wrong. I was feeling so tired and cold this afternoon. I slept and mum told me that I had a fever. Dear also got fever now. Why?! Both of us at the same time. Haha! He's booking out tonight and probably booking in tomorrow unless he extend his MC.
O levels is over. And then again, everything is not over yet. I got lots of activities. I scared I can't handle them man. It's like rushing here and there to different places. Things clash and cancelled. Here and there. Tons of loads of craps. And now I'm feeling sick. I don't feel like doing anything now. Time really flies. I'm afraid that I can't catch up with time.
Yesterday I went to sign in the Chingay Application. Yea. Training starts next month till Feb. I saw the actual day which is on 19th Feb. Time to report is 2pm and everything will finish at 11pm. Oh My god. Almost 12hours. Geesh and somehow they surely will call us in the morning go down for some daimoku for great success of performance. Which means that I'll be busy for more than 12hours.
Currently I'm downloading MapleStory. My friends say that the game is gay. Oh well. I have nothing better to do at home, so download it to kill the time at home right. lol. Yup. This wednesday we gonna have a 'Job Hunting' day. Thursday going for suntanning? Fri? I don't know! I haven't buy graduation night stuff. Saturday kor's BBQ. Sunday.. Crystal ask me to go out with her and emily. Gosh. Please. please please. People out there. Give me a break. I know it's after exams and I have a whole lot of time but hey! I need to rest! Even bernard ask me don't goto that training which clashes on his first chalet day. What the hell. Ended up I have to plan some special plans on that day after the training. Geesh.
O shit. I forgot to tell dd some stuff. Ciaos.!
** Saturday, November 20, 2004 __
Currently Feeling*
Coughing?
I did two good things today which you all may think it isn't any big deal about it. I bathed my dog and sweep the whole house. Haha! Because I don't do this in my life. I mean I do but totally rare. So it's very surprising that my grandma saw me did this and she praised me a lot.
I'm a spoon-fed child. Nobody ask me to do anything when I'm young. I bored in kind of mid wealthy family and my dad's business is getting good, we shifted to a terrace house after my first HDB mansionette(how do you spell this). My family used to employ maids to do the house work. Mum always spoils me. She used to serve me water, drinks, food, even feed me when I was young, maid used to wear for me shoes, socks, tie my hair before going for school. I was treated like a 'princess' and nobody says anything about it. Until my father's business went down down and down, we are forced to shift to Bayshore Park which is one of the condo in ECP. I started to cook my own stuff and doing a little chores but I'm still kind of spoilt because Mum didn't ask me to do anything. Then, I shifted to Pasir Ris after that. And still, Mum didn't force me to do anything. I don't even cook for the family or do any good deeds for the family. Even up till now, I'm really very useless. My family used to blame me for not doing anything and just laze around. Being a useless child in the family, I tried to do things for them to prove them that I'm not. But sometimes, things will go wrong and they blame me that I'm making things worst. Even the recent case, my sis argued with my dad because of me.
What stuff I do, they think it is stupid, meaningless and useless, a burden to them. Is that so? I don't know why. My character and attitude is different as compared to outside than at home. I don't know why I am still so childish. A lil kid who is already 16years(gonna 17yrs in 6more mths) and knows nothing but complain infront of her parents and sit down there doing nothing?! I know. I know I'm always in the wrong but I can't be help. It's a habit. It's hard for me to change so sudden. I wish I could play a part in the family. Even house matters, I'm not well informed. I just feel that I'm sort of an outcast in the family. I don't want them to care even they care for me.
I'm so pissed with it. I don't have total freedom. I can't do things what my sis can do. I asked my mum why? She said I'm still young and childish. Ok. I admit that I'm childish. I want to prove them to them and see that ACTUALLY I'm NOT. They are simply just spoiling me and then say that I can't do anything for them. What do you expect me to do? I don't have my freedom and how they want me to grow up? Everything is limited to me. This I can't that also can't. How do you expect me to learn new things with a boring and same old life. Damn it. I hate this. I hate my family. Even sis is so irritating. Damn.
Forget about this. Argh. Later I'm going out to meet dear and goto TM because of him(that Joi Singer. Shucks. Is she that good? I hate her songs). Yah. I shall stop here. Sigh. Bloody Saturday.
I did two good things today which you all may think it isn't any big deal about it. I bathed my dog and sweep the whole house. Haha! Because I don't do this in my life. I mean I do but totally rare. So it's very surprising that my grandma saw me did this and she praised me a lot.
I'm a spoon-fed child. Nobody ask me to do anything when I'm young. I bored in kind of mid wealthy family and my dad's business is getting good, we shifted to a terrace house after my first HDB mansionette(how do you spell this). My family used to employ maids to do the house work. Mum always spoils me. She used to serve me water, drinks, food, even feed me when I was young, maid used to wear for me shoes, socks, tie my hair before going for school. I was treated like a 'princess' and nobody says anything about it. Until my father's business went down down and down, we are forced to shift to Bayshore Park which is one of the condo in ECP. I started to cook my own stuff and doing a little chores but I'm still kind of spoilt because Mum didn't ask me to do anything. Then, I shifted to Pasir Ris after that. And still, Mum didn't force me to do anything. I don't even cook for the family or do any good deeds for the family. Even up till now, I'm really very useless. My family used to blame me for not doing anything and just laze around. Being a useless child in the family, I tried to do things for them to prove them that I'm not. But sometimes, things will go wrong and they blame me that I'm making things worst. Even the recent case, my sis argued with my dad because of me.
What stuff I do, they think it is stupid, meaningless and useless, a burden to them. Is that so? I don't know why. My character and attitude is different as compared to outside than at home. I don't know why I am still so childish. A lil kid who is already 16years(gonna 17yrs in 6more mths) and knows nothing but complain infront of her parents and sit down there doing nothing?! I know. I know I'm always in the wrong but I can't be help. It's a habit. It's hard for me to change so sudden. I wish I could play a part in the family. Even house matters, I'm not well informed. I just feel that I'm sort of an outcast in the family. I don't want them to care even they care for me.
I'm so pissed with it. I don't have total freedom. I can't do things what my sis can do. I asked my mum why? She said I'm still young and childish. Ok. I admit that I'm childish. I want to prove them to them and see that ACTUALLY I'm NOT. They are simply just spoiling me and then say that I can't do anything for them. What do you expect me to do? I don't have my freedom and how they want me to grow up? Everything is limited to me. This I can't that also can't. How do you expect me to learn new things with a boring and same old life. Damn it. I hate this. I hate my family. Even sis is so irritating. Damn.
Forget about this. Argh. Later I'm going out to meet dear and goto TM because of him(that Joi Singer. Shucks. Is she that good? I hate her songs). Yah. I shall stop here. Sigh. Bloody Saturday.
** Thursday, November 18, 2004 __
Currently Feeling*
Hungry.
I'm munching on some Japanese brand chips (62g) which cost more than 3 bucks. Can you believe it? Just a small little packet and that amount of money, I can eat a plate of chicken rice! I wasn't the one who bought it. My sis was hungry last night and she went to 7-11. She saw this small packet of chips and thought that it cost around a buck plus. Never know when she was paying, the cashier said $3bucks. She can't reject the item because it's kinda weird so she pay it with a bitter face.
I have to goto school later for my POA exam. Oh no. The subject that I suck the most. Not really but I hope I can do it. I think I can do it. Haha! Well, a B4 for it, I'm happy enough.
KiatJun asked our class yesterday morning, 'Eh, wanna go pubbing or clubbing next saturday?' Hur. Well, maybe? I don't know what should I do during holidays now. All I know that tomorrow my girlfriend and I going to dye our hair. This Sunday I'm having a Chingay Audition(I think) and meeting. Next monday our last exam, Tuesday I have to meet C1 for our first 'date'(kinda weird). The rest of the weekdays probably go out for some Grad Nite Shopping with my girlfriends. Next weekend meet my darling probably. And the next next Tuesday I have my Grad Nite at Intercontinental Hotel. Dec 5 I have my outdoor activity in Sentosa. Dec 8-11 I have 2 different chalets to go, one in Sentosa and one in Pasir Ris. Ya. And lots of dates coming up. Cafe Cartel lunch, shopping sprees, some lunch with some friends, work? (You call this don't know what to do during the break? Already packed and planned! lol)
Speaking of work, I don't know what should I work as! Probably I gonna contact my course teacher and employ us! You know she appreciate our(medik and i) 'crap' work design for our class teeshirt which is pin onto the notice board and she asked if we want to work for their company to design their logo etc. Woo. Sounds cool.
My darling probably going to my meeting this Sunday, just to see me. What if my mother founds out? Hmm.. Maybe she don't mind because I brought him there? Maybe she do mind. Maybe something will happen on that day. I don't know. But I just give it a try. I don't know how should I tell my member friends? All along I said I don't have a boyfriend because I don't want them to ask about him if I said I do infront of my mother. Oh god. Haha. I hope they will understand me. I hope someone there will listen to my situation here and I hope they able to help me! After 2 long years, I can sense that the time is coming. My sixth sense tells me.
Talking about sixth sense, I sense that I will meet William yesterday. When I was on my way back(to interchange), I looked around because I know he's somewhere around and he really was! So, to conclude, my sixth sense is roughly 70% accurate. Hur.
K. Talking to darling on phone now. Ciaos.
I'm munching on some Japanese brand chips (62g) which cost more than 3 bucks. Can you believe it? Just a small little packet and that amount of money, I can eat a plate of chicken rice! I wasn't the one who bought it. My sis was hungry last night and she went to 7-11. She saw this small packet of chips and thought that it cost around a buck plus. Never know when she was paying, the cashier said $3bucks. She can't reject the item because it's kinda weird so she pay it with a bitter face.
I have to goto school later for my POA exam. Oh no. The subject that I suck the most. Not really but I hope I can do it. I think I can do it. Haha! Well, a B4 for it, I'm happy enough.
KiatJun asked our class yesterday morning, 'Eh, wanna go pubbing or clubbing next saturday?' Hur. Well, maybe? I don't know what should I do during holidays now. All I know that tomorrow my girlfriend and I going to dye our hair. This Sunday I'm having a Chingay Audition(I think) and meeting. Next monday our last exam, Tuesday I have to meet C1 for our first 'date'(kinda weird). The rest of the weekdays probably go out for some Grad Nite Shopping with my girlfriends. Next weekend meet my darling probably. And the next next Tuesday I have my Grad Nite at Intercontinental Hotel. Dec 5 I have my outdoor activity in Sentosa. Dec 8-11 I have 2 different chalets to go, one in Sentosa and one in Pasir Ris. Ya. And lots of dates coming up. Cafe Cartel lunch, shopping sprees, some lunch with some friends, work? (You call this don't know what to do during the break? Already packed and planned! lol)
Speaking of work, I don't know what should I work as! Probably I gonna contact my course teacher and employ us! You know she appreciate our(medik and i) 'crap' work design for our class teeshirt which is pin onto the notice board and she asked if we want to work for their company to design their logo etc. Woo. Sounds cool.
My darling probably going to my meeting this Sunday, just to see me. What if my mother founds out? Hmm.. Maybe she don't mind because I brought him there? Maybe she do mind. Maybe something will happen on that day. I don't know. But I just give it a try. I don't know how should I tell my member friends? All along I said I don't have a boyfriend because I don't want them to ask about him if I said I do infront of my mother. Oh god. Haha. I hope they will understand me. I hope someone there will listen to my situation here and I hope they able to help me! After 2 long years, I can sense that the time is coming. My sixth sense tells me.
Talking about sixth sense, I sense that I will meet William yesterday. When I was on my way back(to interchange), I looked around because I know he's somewhere around and he really was! So, to conclude, my sixth sense is roughly 70% accurate. Hur.
K. Talking to darling on phone now. Ciaos.
** Wednesday, November 17, 2004 __
Currently Feeling*
Tired. Very tired.
Geesh. It's 1:55pm now. Time flies so slowly. I went to school for Geography 'O' Levels today. Well, it's kinda okay. Not really. Some parts of it needs common sense or whatever shit it is. I don't have common sense okay! Anyway, those questions I'm not really sure I tried to talk cock. Hope it sounds logic and give me right alright! Hur.
Oh ya. That handsome chief invigilator. He's so nice. So cute. So nice smell. So handsome. He came into our class (we're not having our exams in the hall) and collect the exam scripts. I tell you. The girls(my girlfriends and I) go gaga when we saw him. My heart skipped 2 beats when he collected my script. Oh god. He stood beside Medick for a few seconds and they are actually few centimetres apart. I looked at her and try to see what is her expression. Haha! What's his name? I heard they say he's from EVSS huh? Don't know but he drives! He's soooooo cute. Hahahahaha! He simply has the charisma that attracts me. Hurhur. Shit. I can't stop thinking of him but I actually looked into his eyes for a second. Flying~ Haha! What a bytch -_-.
Medick and I went to TM and check out the different hair dyes. Okay. We set. Friday we gonna get them and share(buying 2 different colours to do some mixing). Great.
Thinking of school, I was late for my exam yesterday. I was chatting online with Bernard and he told me that I gonna be late. So I went out and it rained. Geesh. When I reached at the bustop, my bus 88 gone! I waited for a few moments and it came. When I alight at the bustop to change to 27, I realised it was already 1.38pm. (20min if i take 27 but there's not 27 yet and I also need time to walk to school) Thank god I saw a cab nearby and I flagged at it. I thought it didn't see me or else I'm in dead shit. And I actually wasted some minutes because the taxi thought it was St 21 instead of St12. Geesh. I manage to reach school JUST IN TIME. I heard the handsome said 'The time is 2pm now. You have exactly 1hour30min. You may begin' . Oh god. I can't find my seat! Thanks zul for directing me when he saw me. Phew. And my exam paper isn't on my desk! Wasted another few minutes while waiting for the teachers to give me my script. BUT. I able to finish everything before the time's up. Hurhur. What a day -_-.
I'm so bored now. I thought of sleeping till evening and take a look at my POA formats but my hair is wet now. It's going to rain soon too. Alright. Anyway this is a temporary blog layout. I shall design on it when I'm free one of these days. Cheers* Ciaos.
Geesh. It's 1:55pm now. Time flies so slowly. I went to school for Geography 'O' Levels today. Well, it's kinda okay. Not really. Some parts of it needs common sense or whatever shit it is. I don't have common sense okay! Anyway, those questions I'm not really sure I tried to talk cock. Hope it sounds logic and give me right alright! Hur.
Oh ya. That handsome chief invigilator. He's so nice. So cute. So nice smell. So handsome. He came into our class (we're not having our exams in the hall) and collect the exam scripts. I tell you. The girls(my girlfriends and I) go gaga when we saw him. My heart skipped 2 beats when he collected my script. Oh god. He stood beside Medick for a few seconds and they are actually few centimetres apart. I looked at her and try to see what is her expression. Haha! What's his name? I heard they say he's from EVSS huh? Don't know but he drives! He's soooooo cute. Hahahahaha! He simply has the charisma that attracts me. Hurhur. Shit. I can't stop thinking of him but I actually looked into his eyes for a second. Flying~ Haha! What a bytch -_-.
Medick and I went to TM and check out the different hair dyes. Okay. We set. Friday we gonna get them and share(buying 2 different colours to do some mixing). Great.
Thinking of school, I was late for my exam yesterday. I was chatting online with Bernard and he told me that I gonna be late. So I went out and it rained. Geesh. When I reached at the bustop, my bus 88 gone! I waited for a few moments and it came. When I alight at the bustop to change to 27, I realised it was already 1.38pm. (20min if i take 27 but there's not 27 yet and I also need time to walk to school) Thank god I saw a cab nearby and I flagged at it. I thought it didn't see me or else I'm in dead shit. And I actually wasted some minutes because the taxi thought it was St 21 instead of St12. Geesh. I manage to reach school JUST IN TIME. I heard the handsome said 'The time is 2pm now. You have exactly 1hour30min. You may begin' . Oh god. I can't find my seat! Thanks zul for directing me when he saw me. Phew. And my exam paper isn't on my desk! Wasted another few minutes while waiting for the teachers to give me my script. BUT. I able to finish everything before the time's up. Hurhur. What a day -_-.
I'm so bored now. I thought of sleeping till evening and take a look at my POA formats but my hair is wet now. It's going to rain soon too. Alright. Anyway this is a temporary blog layout. I shall design on it when I'm free one of these days. Cheers* Ciaos.
** Tuesday, November 16, 2004 __
Currently Feeling*
tired.
I'm so f**ing tired. Sighs. I dreamt of him again. Really? It's quite vague but why him again! Do really I can't forget him? I don't think so. Even in dreams.. It seemed that the time we spend together is so short but they are sweet. Hur.. Geesh this is making me confuse about love. No. I musn't let this dream affect me! What I had decided is already done. No more mistakes! ^^ I dreamt that I meet him until I forgot to go for exams and I shout so loud in my dreams 'AHHH. WHAT THE FISH!' Haha! Think too much already eh?
I'm so hungry. Very hungry. I plan to wake up at 7am. Then i set another alarm at 8 but I woke up at 8.20. -_- 5 more hours to exam. I still got time to study and I'm wasting my time on blogging? Duh. I didn't really study much actually. Just trying to chunk one whole load of infomations into my brain. I doubt I can remember them clearly. Woo. The weather looks great now. The sun is shining on those blocks of flats opposite me. Looks so 'hot'. Good for suntanning. Haha!
I'm still hungry! Dear won't be meeting me till next weekend I suppose. Aww. SISPEC what you expect. Suffer In Slient Plus Extra Confinement (SISPEC). Hurhur.. I still wonder if he's really mine. After those stuff he said, I feel that there is a little distance between us. Maybe I'm just thinking much. I was so touch that day when he say I'll will always be his bb. ~.~ I don't know why or what or how.. He seldom tells me these kind of stuff. Immediately, my tears rolled down my cheeks. =( I realised he's such a sweet guy actually if he really want to. Little good stuff from him simply makes me happy. Thats why I say Nan Ren Bu Huai Nuu Ren Bu Ai. When you treat a girl too good, listen to her everytime.. Those sweet words you give her everyday.. One day, she find that you're so boring and the sweet words are simply nothing! Ya. Those want to be mine, please be BAD hor. Haha! Kidding. No Chance ah. Don't wanna give chance. And... Who will want me sia. Hurhur.
Sian half. I feel like sleeping all the way. My eyes are half closed now. Geesh. Nobody is online.. Except c1 is talking to me now. Medik asked me last night if I want to go and dye my hair this Saturday. Well maybe.. If I have the money. I don't want those DIY one. Yea. Sighs. 6 days left to end my exams. Well who cares about the last paper which is Science Paper 1 and it's also on the Monday (monday blues). I mean it's not i really don't care. I just wanna give myself a break during the weekend. (I had already have enough break!) Hur. Excuses. Thursday and Friday is POA. I hope I can pass. I mean I didn't even study for any of the POA class test / exams before in my 2years of school life. Haha!
Alright alright. I shall go and read through my notes once again. (I'm trying!) And uhh.. Talk to c1 online.. Then.. bath.. eat.. or don't know what else I can do before going to school. Sigh. Life sucks. I hate exams. It gives me the phobia! Ciaos.
I'm so f**ing tired. Sighs. I dreamt of him again. Really? It's quite vague but why him again! Do really I can't forget him? I don't think so. Even in dreams.. It seemed that the time we spend together is so short but they are sweet. Hur.. Geesh this is making me confuse about love. No. I musn't let this dream affect me! What I had decided is already done. No more mistakes! ^^ I dreamt that I meet him until I forgot to go for exams and I shout so loud in my dreams 'AHHH. WHAT THE FISH!' Haha! Think too much already eh?
I'm so hungry. Very hungry. I plan to wake up at 7am. Then i set another alarm at 8 but I woke up at 8.20. -_- 5 more hours to exam. I still got time to study and I'm wasting my time on blogging? Duh. I didn't really study much actually. Just trying to chunk one whole load of infomations into my brain. I doubt I can remember them clearly. Woo. The weather looks great now. The sun is shining on those blocks of flats opposite me. Looks so 'hot'. Good for suntanning. Haha!
I'm still hungry! Dear won't be meeting me till next weekend I suppose. Aww. SISPEC what you expect. Suffer In Slient Plus Extra Confinement (SISPEC). Hurhur.. I still wonder if he's really mine. After those stuff he said, I feel that there is a little distance between us. Maybe I'm just thinking much. I was so touch that day when he say I'll will always be his bb. ~.~ I don't know why or what or how.. He seldom tells me these kind of stuff. Immediately, my tears rolled down my cheeks. =( I realised he's such a sweet guy actually if he really want to. Little good stuff from him simply makes me happy. Thats why I say Nan Ren Bu Huai Nuu Ren Bu Ai. When you treat a girl too good, listen to her everytime.. Those sweet words you give her everyday.. One day, she find that you're so boring and the sweet words are simply nothing! Ya. Those want to be mine, please be BAD hor. Haha! Kidding. No Chance ah. Don't wanna give chance. And... Who will want me sia. Hurhur.
Sian half. I feel like sleeping all the way. My eyes are half closed now. Geesh. Nobody is online.. Except c1 is talking to me now. Medik asked me last night if I want to go and dye my hair this Saturday. Well maybe.. If I have the money. I don't want those DIY one. Yea. Sighs. 6 days left to end my exams. Well who cares about the last paper which is Science Paper 1 and it's also on the Monday (monday blues). I mean it's not i really don't care. I just wanna give myself a break during the weekend. (I had already have enough break!) Hur. Excuses. Thursday and Friday is POA. I hope I can pass. I mean I didn't even study for any of the POA class test / exams before in my 2years of school life. Haha!
Alright alright. I shall go and read through my notes once again. (I'm trying!) And uhh.. Talk to c1 online.. Then.. bath.. eat.. or don't know what else I can do before going to school. Sigh. Life sucks. I hate exams. It gives me the phobia! Ciaos.
** Sunday, November 14, 2004 __
Currently Feeling*
bored
Back? Yea. Kinda. Feeling tired now. I went to Rama Thai for Shark Fin dinner just now at Chinatown. the bill was $265 for 6 person. And it's only 3 dishes. What the hell . One person $40+. I think I can eat so many meals for so many days with that money. And I tell you.. I'm hungry now. HAHA. What the fish. Next time don't eat at this kind of restaurant. Not worth it. Oh well.
I'm really slacking now. I hate it when there's a long break inbetween exams. Once you stop you cant start your engine again and my next paper is only a day plus away! Shucks! Probably I REALLY need to mug 24/2 already. Haha! Just few more papers and I'm done with it. Lots of activites coming up! Chingay training.. Yea yea.. Chalets.. Outdoor activities. Job seeking. Woolala. What else? Umm... Christmas is coming! Oh my god. Time really flies. I thought the last Christmas was only.. few months ago? Haha! Say good bye to 2004, say Hello to 2005. Omgomgomg. This is real fast! ~.~
Oh ya. I want to start a new interest already - Photographer. Yup. Probably when i have the money I gonna buy cameras etc. Yea. Cool eh. =p Forget about my Astronomer dream. I don't think I can. Haha. Awww. Nah. I put it aside it first. =| Maybe next life bah.. work in NASA. *dreaming*
Alright alright. Gotta mug mug and mug! Oh ya. I tried on the subaru bear's 'jumper' on coco. Too small! Almost can fit in la but she's so cute with it. COol eh. =P kay. blog other time. miss u guys!
Back? Yea. Kinda. Feeling tired now. I went to Rama Thai for Shark Fin dinner just now at Chinatown. the bill was $265 for 6 person. And it's only 3 dishes. What the hell . One person $40+. I think I can eat so many meals for so many days with that money. And I tell you.. I'm hungry now. HAHA. What the fish. Next time don't eat at this kind of restaurant. Not worth it. Oh well.
I'm really slacking now. I hate it when there's a long break inbetween exams. Once you stop you cant start your engine again and my next paper is only a day plus away! Shucks! Probably I REALLY need to mug 24/2 already. Haha! Just few more papers and I'm done with it. Lots of activites coming up! Chingay training.. Yea yea.. Chalets.. Outdoor activities. Job seeking. Woolala. What else? Umm... Christmas is coming! Oh my god. Time really flies. I thought the last Christmas was only.. few months ago? Haha! Say good bye to 2004, say Hello to 2005. Omgomgomg. This is real fast! ~.~
Oh ya. I want to start a new interest already - Photographer. Yup. Probably when i have the money I gonna buy cameras etc. Yea. Cool eh. =p Forget about my Astronomer dream. I don't think I can. Haha. Awww. Nah. I put it aside it first. =| Maybe next life bah.. work in NASA. *dreaming*
Alright alright. Gotta mug mug and mug! Oh ya. I tried on the subaru bear's 'jumper' on coco. Too small! Almost can fit in la but she's so cute with it. COol eh. =P kay. blog other time. miss u guys!
** Saturday, November 13, 2004 __
Currently Feeling*
hungry.
Mmm.. Great week today! Tuesday I went out with my Bernard di to ECP. Woo. that day was damn tiring. Walked to many places till my leg hurts. I saw Christopher Lee in Bugis, fliming some show. Today we went to the motorshow and I saw him again in Suntec! What the hell. Bunch of 'tom boys' laughing and giggling when they saw him. Haha! Seen him twice in a week. Isn't fated? LOL! I told my sis about this, and she said.. 'Why didn't you meet someone better looking?' DUH. So bad eh!
Well, today went to watch The Forgotten. I don't understand the ending! -_- Not bad eh but actually a little boring that i almost slept but some parts of it scares you. I think that is the purpose to make u awake during the show! Haha! Then we went for Motorshow. Aww. We didn't get the tickets for Stunt Show. Too late. All gone! >< Not bad la. Better than Dreamcars. But somehow Dreamcars is also better than Motorshow? Yups. Took quite a number of pictures. We wanted to go back the last day to ask for the posters when they keeping the stuff. Haha! Ber bought me a STI polo tee and Subaru Bear. So sweet. But i mean i insisted to pay it myself but he insisted to pay it for me! Ahhh! He even treat me movie and snacks, our Genki Sushi dinner, drinks and sorts and help me a lot! Also ask me want this want that, buy for me. I say NO! I'm so guilty! I want to stop this! Ahh. He said it's alright but I DO MIND! Never mind. Treat him a great feast next time. He's too good to me and I feel weird. =|
And ya. I bought the 'turn left turn right' collectible. $299.95 For some reasons. Keke!
Go out with him need to bring A LOT of money. Haha! But he's nice yea. I love him as a brother. ><
Yup. Anyway, he's back! Damn liar actor. I knew it. But was it fun anyway? NO! Ya. All thanks to that JZ's book. If not he won't ask me and we won't go out? Haha! I had told myself.. Once i able to grab hold of him, I will NEVER let go. I promise. He asked me to take Our Book back. I take a look. Wdf? I didn't know last time I was so childish. So irritating! Arghh! I didn't take back. For some reasons but i don't know what was that? i went to his place. his mom.. was kinda shock to see me. haha! i still can rmb her expressions! haha! but opps. forgot to say bye b4 i go. >< lol.
Oh ya. I find that I getting weird these days. Whenever a person ask me something or tell me something, I will take a minute to answer back. Because I was doing some stuff or busy, her words take me a long time to process and enter to my brain and suddenly I will answer..'ya' ..'oh.. issit?' ..'ok.' or an example which happened last night.. She told me something about her bag. I went to my mom's room. Taking something which took almost a minute. Then suddenly I remember she told me something and few more seconds to process in my brain. Finally I was out of the room and answer her 'what did you say?' -_- and my sis replied 'YOU DAMN SLOW LEH!' I'm getting retard! And it's damn slow I can tell you. And this irritates my sis. HAHA. What's happening man! Haha!!
3:01am now. I missss him! >< He should have taken MC actually. Haha! xD~ I miss everyone! I suddenly think of that cute 'old' guy in motorshow. I was collecting the free subaru DVD. Then this guy talk talk talk. Saw bernard sweating. And he gave him 2 fan. and said 'you really need these'. LoL! then suddenly say 'get 1 for your gf la!' .. i heard that and i '.......' lol! peng. Really ah? Gf ah? hahahaha! =p
saturday ah. i think i need to jog early in the morning now and study! last week 1 day of exams and im done with it! really need a job badly. yea.
okay bah. boring night. needa dl S.h.e and jolin's new album. aaah? =| i missssss you dear. ^^ muacks.!
Mmm.. Great week today! Tuesday I went out with my Bernard di to ECP. Woo. that day was damn tiring. Walked to many places till my leg hurts. I saw Christopher Lee in Bugis, fliming some show. Today we went to the motorshow and I saw him again in Suntec! What the hell. Bunch of 'tom boys' laughing and giggling when they saw him. Haha! Seen him twice in a week. Isn't fated? LOL! I told my sis about this, and she said.. 'Why didn't you meet someone better looking?' DUH. So bad eh!
Well, today went to watch The Forgotten. I don't understand the ending! -_- Not bad eh but actually a little boring that i almost slept but some parts of it scares you. I think that is the purpose to make u awake during the show! Haha! Then we went for Motorshow. Aww. We didn't get the tickets for Stunt Show. Too late. All gone! >< Not bad la. Better than Dreamcars. But somehow Dreamcars is also better than Motorshow? Yups. Took quite a number of pictures. We wanted to go back the last day to ask for the posters when they keeping the stuff. Haha! Ber bought me a STI polo tee and Subaru Bear. So sweet. But i mean i insisted to pay it myself but he insisted to pay it for me! Ahhh! He even treat me movie and snacks, our Genki Sushi dinner, drinks and sorts and help me a lot! Also ask me want this want that, buy for me. I say NO! I'm so guilty! I want to stop this! Ahh. He said it's alright but I DO MIND! Never mind. Treat him a great feast next time. He's too good to me and I feel weird. =|
And ya. I bought the 'turn left turn right' collectible. $299.95 For some reasons. Keke!
Go out with him need to bring A LOT of money. Haha! But he's nice yea. I love him as a brother. ><
Yup. Anyway, he's back! Damn liar actor. I knew it. But was it fun anyway? NO! Ya. All thanks to that JZ's book. If not he won't ask me and we won't go out? Haha! I had told myself.. Once i able to grab hold of him, I will NEVER let go. I promise. He asked me to take Our Book back. I take a look. Wdf? I didn't know last time I was so childish. So irritating! Arghh! I didn't take back. For some reasons but i don't know what was that? i went to his place. his mom.. was kinda shock to see me. haha! i still can rmb her expressions! haha! but opps. forgot to say bye b4 i go. >< lol.
Oh ya. I find that I getting weird these days. Whenever a person ask me something or tell me something, I will take a minute to answer back. Because I was doing some stuff or busy, her words take me a long time to process and enter to my brain and suddenly I will answer..'ya' ..'oh.. issit?' ..'ok.' or an example which happened last night.. She told me something about her bag. I went to my mom's room. Taking something which took almost a minute. Then suddenly I remember she told me something and few more seconds to process in my brain. Finally I was out of the room and answer her 'what did you say?' -_- and my sis replied 'YOU DAMN SLOW LEH!' I'm getting retard! And it's damn slow I can tell you. And this irritates my sis. HAHA. What's happening man! Haha!!
3:01am now. I missss him! >< He should have taken MC actually. Haha! xD~ I miss everyone! I suddenly think of that cute 'old' guy in motorshow. I was collecting the free subaru DVD. Then this guy talk talk talk. Saw bernard sweating. And he gave him 2 fan. and said 'you really need these'. LoL! then suddenly say 'get 1 for your gf la!' .. i heard that and i '.......' lol! peng. Really ah? Gf ah? hahahaha! =p
saturday ah. i think i need to jog early in the morning now and study! last week 1 day of exams and im done with it! really need a job badly. yea.
okay bah. boring night. needa dl S.h.e and jolin's new album. aaah? =| i missssss you dear. ^^ muacks.!
** Wednesday, November 10, 2004 __
Currently Feeling*
don't know
My heart is so.. How do you describe. Scared? Nah. I'm not. I'm feeling alright but it seems that the heart is still... still what? I don't know. No words can describe how I feel now. Maybe I don't feel anything but I can feel a slight ache in my heart. Oh ya. Heartache. That's the word.
[[ winamp 5.01 . playing Ashlee Simpson - 03 - [Autobiography] - Shadow . sample rate 44.1KHz . bitrate 128kpbs . mode Stereo ]]
I'm so bored. My butt is so painful. I was sitting here since 1pm. Yea maybe. Too bored. My next paper will be next Tuesday. I need to memorise History! Shucks. Never mind. Put this aside. I need a break. Seriously. Brain is slacking now. Rot. Heart is crying. Body is tiring. Legs are aching. Damn. I'm hungry but I don't feel hungry. What the hell am I talking. Okay. I know what I feel now. Tired. My brain is dysfunctioned. Oh man. Why? I don't know.
Hmm.. Tomorrow I'll be meeting him. Wonder what should I do? What should I say? Oh man. This sucks. Seems like 'First Date' feeling. Sigh. My heart.. still aches. I was doing my Geography Paper 1 today and suddenly the feeling came back. Damn I hate this. Even yesterday's geography paper and emaths paper the day before. I just trying to distract it away. But it kept on flowing back! After I finished my paper, I still got 30min more. I just sleep. I don't know why.. I feel so tired. Very tired. I just knock out after 1min when I closed my eyes. The pain in my heart is killing me. I can't stand it much longer. *Sighs*
My friends are saying that I'm so silly. Is he really that WORTH IT? Oh. This question. Don't ask me. Ask my heart. =) It won't be answered because I don't know but I know what I'm doing. Please. People out there. Stop telling me this or that. I know you all care for me but the future is mine not yours. Don't need to worry bout me. I really need to get a job. Arghh! Exams . Please.. Finish it fast! I need to work! I need money! Yea. Hope all the things I gonna do are worth it. I have plans. Keke. Feel much better after I planned something. =)
[[ winamp 5.01 . playing Embrace - Gravity . sample rate 44.1KHz . bitrate 128kpbs . mode Joint Stereo ]]
Bored you know! Argh! >< Friendster is down too and I can't find few songs that I really really really love! Whyyy!!! Geesh.. *sigh* I can't help it but to sigh! Man. I'm hungry too. I haven't eaten for the whole day except I had an egg, 2 glasses of milk and a Mac Milo. ><~
I think I need to rest now. Very tired. Blog other time. =)Btw, I shall design another layout soon. yea. gonna think of another theme. what about a heart with knife stabbing through? Nah... yuck. i think i know what to put already. wait till i design finish n post it up then. kakaka!
im thinking of you.. and me..
the story hasn't end.. in my dreams..
i'll be there.. waiting..
My heart is so.. How do you describe. Scared? Nah. I'm not. I'm feeling alright but it seems that the heart is still... still what? I don't know. No words can describe how I feel now. Maybe I don't feel anything but I can feel a slight ache in my heart. Oh ya. Heartache. That's the word.
[[ winamp 5.01 . playing Ashlee Simpson - 03 - [Autobiography] - Shadow . sample rate 44.1KHz . bitrate 128kpbs . mode Stereo ]]
I'm so bored. My butt is so painful. I was sitting here since 1pm. Yea maybe. Too bored. My next paper will be next Tuesday. I need to memorise History! Shucks. Never mind. Put this aside. I need a break. Seriously. Brain is slacking now. Rot. Heart is crying. Body is tiring. Legs are aching. Damn. I'm hungry but I don't feel hungry. What the hell am I talking. Okay. I know what I feel now. Tired. My brain is dysfunctioned. Oh man. Why? I don't know.
Hmm.. Tomorrow I'll be meeting him. Wonder what should I do? What should I say? Oh man. This sucks. Seems like 'First Date' feeling. Sigh. My heart.. still aches. I was doing my Geography Paper 1 today and suddenly the feeling came back. Damn I hate this. Even yesterday's geography paper and emaths paper the day before. I just trying to distract it away. But it kept on flowing back! After I finished my paper, I still got 30min more. I just sleep. I don't know why.. I feel so tired. Very tired. I just knock out after 1min when I closed my eyes. The pain in my heart is killing me. I can't stand it much longer. *Sighs*
My friends are saying that I'm so silly. Is he really that WORTH IT? Oh. This question. Don't ask me. Ask my heart. =) It won't be answered because I don't know but I know what I'm doing. Please. People out there. Stop telling me this or that. I know you all care for me but the future is mine not yours. Don't need to worry bout me. I really need to get a job. Arghh! Exams . Please.. Finish it fast! I need to work! I need money! Yea. Hope all the things I gonna do are worth it. I have plans. Keke. Feel much better after I planned something. =)
[[ winamp 5.01 . playing Embrace - Gravity . sample rate 44.1KHz . bitrate 128kpbs . mode Joint Stereo ]]
Bored you know! Argh! >< Friendster is down too and I can't find few songs that I really really really love! Whyyy!!! Geesh.. *sigh* I can't help it but to sigh! Man. I'm hungry too. I haven't eaten for the whole day except I had an egg, 2 glasses of milk and a Mac Milo. ><~
I think I need to rest now. Very tired. Blog other time. =)Btw, I shall design another layout soon. yea. gonna think of another theme. what about a heart with knife stabbing through? Nah... yuck. i think i know what to put already. wait till i design finish n post it up then. kakaka!
im thinking of you.. and me..
the story hasn't end.. in my dreams..
i'll be there.. waiting..
** Sunday, November 07, 2004 __
Currently Feeling*
...
i forgot to tell you all. I almost died the last few days. Died in a indirect way. I dreamt of a 'someone' taking my soul away. it's so real. damn real. i can feel someone is pulling me up. My soul is already above my body. i tried to struggle back. i manage to go back my body after some time but the head is still hanging above. i tried to shout out, move and open my eyes. i cant! i was damn scared that i'll be gone that day. thinking that i still have many stuff haven accomplish, i musnt let myself go. soon, that 'someone' let me go and i woke up with a unstable heart.
last few days, i ran as fast as i could to forget my worries. i went to the playground. suddenly my vision blured. i couldn't walk properly or breathe properly. my heart stop for 2-3 sec. i cant feel anything. i simply tried to walk around the playground, trying to make myself awake. im fainting. i cant hear anything at that time! no sound at all. its very scary that u live in the world without noise. i tried to cough. i tried many ways not to make me collapse. my heart skipped few beats and i quickly sat down and relax myself.
argh. and many weird stuff going on too! -____-*
i forgot to tell you all. I almost died the last few days. Died in a indirect way. I dreamt of a 'someone' taking my soul away. it's so real. damn real. i can feel someone is pulling me up. My soul is already above my body. i tried to struggle back. i manage to go back my body after some time but the head is still hanging above. i tried to shout out, move and open my eyes. i cant! i was damn scared that i'll be gone that day. thinking that i still have many stuff haven accomplish, i musnt let myself go. soon, that 'someone' let me go and i woke up with a unstable heart.
last few days, i ran as fast as i could to forget my worries. i went to the playground. suddenly my vision blured. i couldn't walk properly or breathe properly. my heart stop for 2-3 sec. i cant feel anything. i simply tried to walk around the playground, trying to make myself awake. im fainting. i cant hear anything at that time! no sound at all. its very scary that u live in the world without noise. i tried to cough. i tried many ways not to make me collapse. my heart skipped few beats and i quickly sat down and relax myself.
argh. and many weird stuff going on too! -____-*
hrtbrken
Shit. Everything is from bad to worst. This sucks. I think I going to have a 100% depression. 50% now actually. I scared I will lose my head and do something silly. I better type all these before that happens. Damn. No chance at all? I'll wait. Even it takes years or forever, I will still waiting for your return. I'm still a stubborn fisherman who don't want to let go his fishes even they want to struggle back to the sea. I will do anything to catch those fishes I love. I'm selfish. That's why I'm a fisherman who sells fishes to people! Eventhough there are many bigger and better fishes in the sea, no matter how good they are how much they gonna seduce and phycho me to take them, I will still choose the smallest and bad fish that I love. Thats me. I'm this stubborn. I'll do anything to satisfy my heart. It's crying and bleeding now. There's no cure for it yet. While my brain and myself is the doctor, seaching for remedy and a cure for the heart. Maybe I myself unable to cure it, but at least there will be SOMEONE or SOMETHING will help. Nothing is impossible. I'll make the impossible to the possible. I'll change as much as I can to fit into the everchanging world. I musn't be weak. I don't want to let everyone see that I'm weak. They will look down on me. I MUSN'T! GAMBATTE! I have to finish my exams smoothly and think about this matter. Let fate decide too. And fate changes everything. I believe in fate. I believe in myself too. Who says I can't do it? I CAN means I CAN AND I WILL!
You will see. You're gonna be mine. . Forever.
I don't wanna make anymore mistakes again. NEVER!
My final decision.. YOU*
*cheers*
Shit. Everything is from bad to worst. This sucks. I think I going to have a 100% depression. 50% now actually. I scared I will lose my head and do something silly. I better type all these before that happens. Damn. No chance at all? I'll wait. Even it takes years or forever, I will still waiting for your return. I'm still a stubborn fisherman who don't want to let go his fishes even they want to struggle back to the sea. I will do anything to catch those fishes I love. I'm selfish. That's why I'm a fisherman who sells fishes to people! Eventhough there are many bigger and better fishes in the sea, no matter how good they are how much they gonna seduce and phycho me to take them, I will still choose the smallest and bad fish that I love. Thats me. I'm this stubborn. I'll do anything to satisfy my heart. It's crying and bleeding now. There's no cure for it yet. While my brain and myself is the doctor, seaching for remedy and a cure for the heart. Maybe I myself unable to cure it, but at least there will be SOMEONE or SOMETHING will help. Nothing is impossible. I'll make the impossible to the possible. I'll change as much as I can to fit into the everchanging world. I musn't be weak. I don't want to let everyone see that I'm weak. They will look down on me. I MUSN'T! GAMBATTE! I have to finish my exams smoothly and think about this matter. Let fate decide too. And fate changes everything. I believe in fate. I believe in myself too. Who says I can't do it? I CAN means I CAN AND I WILL!
You will see. You're gonna be mine. . Forever.
I don't wanna make anymore mistakes again. NEVER!
My final decision.. YOU*
*cheers*