** Friday, August 26, 2005 __
Currently Feeling*
sneezy.
I can't stop sneezing! Feeling weird now. Hmm.. My first semester exams are round the corner. One week away and i haven't even start any revisions? But I don't want to take any sub paper either! Furthermore, I don't even have any motivation to study at all? Sheesh. Time flies REAL fast.
I don't know why I can't even catch up with the things around me now. I don't even have time or stress management. I realised that's my weaknesses after I entered poly. I keep on rushing on things uneccessary. My attitude changes from bad to worst. I become lamer (my family and friends + dee said so). I think I got influenced by Garfield and the rest nowadays. I become more direct ( I guessed so). I don't know. I just think I don't feel the same as before. I don't find it good or bad?
Sometimes I can just go quiet all of the sudden and show you attitude. Or rather my mood swings may come anytime. Anywhere? I don't know. I hate myself. I don't want that either. Nor anyone else. But I just couldn't help it!
Maybe it's one of the sign of changing. I don't know? There's lots of perplexing questions pondering in my mind. And I keep asking around. No one knows the answer. Or rather they just answered me 'Why bother?'. But I just want to know it! I don't know why I hate to leave task around incomplete or questions not answered. I can't sleep for that night. Even I did sleep, the next morning, the first thing you think is that topic or task. You feel stress about it that you want to finish it up and get things done. I don't know. I'm not like that in the past. I'm used to be those 'don't bother' type. But now I'm those 'get things done immediately' type. Which is bad for me? Maybe things arn't the same as before and that's how it affected me.
Lots of things happened. Really. People pisses me off easily. Not PMS. Not what. Nothing major actually happened in life but I still don't get why and what and how and where or when? Everthing to me is a mystery. I just can't find any answer that totally satisfy me. I don't know. My mind is getting more complex. I mean my thinking. I tend to think lots and lots. I don't mean it. People will just say 'why bother?' again. And again, I don't know! I'm just thinking too much! No big deal actually.
It's all in the mind. Urghh. Need psychologist. Those mental "scene" or "sounds" keep appearing. Getting worst than before. Getting more complex. More and more. More noisy. Can you comprehend what I've said? I doubt so.
I've tinted+hilighted my hair today. Cost $90+. My hilighted part isn't obvious. Shucks. I think I gonna redo it some other time.
The world is so complicated. That's why people prefer simple stuff. Read simple books, simple stories, prefer simple life.
I can't stop sneezing! Feeling weird now. Hmm.. My first semester exams are round the corner. One week away and i haven't even start any revisions? But I don't want to take any sub paper either! Furthermore, I don't even have any motivation to study at all? Sheesh. Time flies REAL fast.
I don't know why I can't even catch up with the things around me now. I don't even have time or stress management. I realised that's my weaknesses after I entered poly. I keep on rushing on things uneccessary. My attitude changes from bad to worst. I become lamer (my family and friends + dee said so). I think I got influenced by Garfield and the rest nowadays. I become more direct ( I guessed so). I don't know. I just think I don't feel the same as before. I don't find it good or bad?
Sometimes I can just go quiet all of the sudden and show you attitude. Or rather my mood swings may come anytime. Anywhere? I don't know. I hate myself. I don't want that either. Nor anyone else. But I just couldn't help it!
Maybe it's one of the sign of changing. I don't know? There's lots of perplexing questions pondering in my mind. And I keep asking around. No one knows the answer. Or rather they just answered me 'Why bother?'. But I just want to know it! I don't know why I hate to leave task around incomplete or questions not answered. I can't sleep for that night. Even I did sleep, the next morning, the first thing you think is that topic or task. You feel stress about it that you want to finish it up and get things done. I don't know. I'm not like that in the past. I'm used to be those 'don't bother' type. But now I'm those 'get things done immediately' type. Which is bad for me? Maybe things arn't the same as before and that's how it affected me.
Lots of things happened. Really. People pisses me off easily. Not PMS. Not what. Nothing major actually happened in life but I still don't get why and what and how and where or when? Everthing to me is a mystery. I just can't find any answer that totally satisfy me. I don't know. My mind is getting more complex. I mean my thinking. I tend to think lots and lots. I don't mean it. People will just say 'why bother?' again. And again, I don't know! I'm just thinking too much! No big deal actually.
It's all in the mind. Urghh. Need psychologist. Those mental "scene" or "sounds" keep appearing. Getting worst than before. Getting more complex. More and more. More noisy. Can you comprehend what I've said? I doubt so.
I've tinted+hilighted my hair today. Cost $90+. My hilighted part isn't obvious. Shucks. I think I gonna redo it some other time.
The world is so complicated. That's why people prefer simple stuff. Read simple books, simple stories, prefer simple life.