** Monday, May 17, 2004 __
Currently Feeling*
shag ah shag.
I would like to thank KiatJun,Henry,Simon,Derek,KerSiang,Jeremy,Mark And Medik for treating a movie ticket for my birthday in advance. Lol. thanks :) Frens forever yea? tomorrow is last day of mid year exams. didnt study at all for both science and history. Heck. i dont care if i fail. hate history actually. but somehow my laziness made it worst. sighs.
betty ah betty. she was grounded again. aw man.. i feel sad for you. wait become like me. having a relationship in the dark. cant share with family members. cant bring him home. and everything got to do with him have to lie. and i been lying to my families for almost 2 years. ok. not 2. 1year8mths so far. i really cant stand this kind of life. i wish to say everything out but i knew the circumstances. he and me. suffered like this. no freedom of loving. i still can recall that day i was grounded by my mom. we thought that by telling everything to her can solve this 'no-freedom' love. 1) Free 2) Break. And of cuz. the answer is 2. i was very depress that time. but he told me to keep in a low profile. and secretly going out. i lied to my mom. and i used my friends names. hate it! sorry friends out there if i used your names. i really cant think of anymore! i really want to have my freedom. without freedom, i wont have happiness. and thats all i wanted in my life. my long term goal. after this 1yr8mth, everything turn out fine? mom found out that i still contact him. cuz dat time i used her fone to sms him with sweet talks? and she question me. omg. hate it. hate someone questioning you and you're guilty about it. and all i just say is 'hanna hanna. okokokokok.' and occasionally she will just pop out the question 'do you still contact with that stupid jl?' i felt so. Scared? all of the sudden. and i just lie again 'no.' argh! sigh. really wish to break this barrier in my life and heck everything? i dont know. i can do anything as long i get my freedom. i don't understand why my parents have to do this to me. am i looks or sound unsensible and innocent to them? and those kind of kid who knows nuts and like TOO YOUNG for anything? shucks. i wanna let them see the real me. the real shp that i really am. sigh. betty, all the best kie? dont give up! good luck =)with all the support from me and ur galfriends and especially your belove dear, you be able to solve this out. got time we murder our parents k? haha! yea... =)~
ok. no time for this. man. this sucks. i hate my life because of this. well, talk about today. having my geog p1. only 1.25hrs? what the hell. budden as i mention those peeps out there treat me a movie. and after that, mark,medik and i went around CS to window shop? lol. look at bras? haha! mark horny! =x went around every corner of metro. and around 2+ i went to dd house again. i dont know whats with me. i feel so sad all of the sudden. i threw temper at him. threw him stuff on the floor. like mad? he scolded me. i cry. cry alot. don't know why. becoming a retard. biting my hands. playing stuff without any reason like those retards out there. (opps.) and staring outside the window. wishing to jump down. argh. but he came to me,hug me and pull me away from the window. like as if dont wanna let me go.. sigh. he melt my heart. and i stop this retard nonsensical stuff.and then.. erm.. having fun? probably. and sleep from 5-7pm. still very tired. budden he gotta go katong to meet his mom. so went back myself. and reached home around 8pm+. and rot infront of the pc. :| yea and i think thats all? this post is long. dont wanna be too 'lor sor'. ciaos.
I would like to thank KiatJun,Henry,Simon,Derek,KerSiang,Jeremy,Mark And Medik for treating a movie ticket for my birthday in advance. Lol. thanks :) Frens forever yea? tomorrow is last day of mid year exams. didnt study at all for both science and history. Heck. i dont care if i fail. hate history actually. but somehow my laziness made it worst. sighs.
betty ah betty. she was grounded again. aw man.. i feel sad for you. wait become like me. having a relationship in the dark. cant share with family members. cant bring him home. and everything got to do with him have to lie. and i been lying to my families for almost 2 years. ok. not 2. 1year8mths so far. i really cant stand this kind of life. i wish to say everything out but i knew the circumstances. he and me. suffered like this. no freedom of loving. i still can recall that day i was grounded by my mom. we thought that by telling everything to her can solve this 'no-freedom' love. 1) Free 2) Break. And of cuz. the answer is 2. i was very depress that time. but he told me to keep in a low profile. and secretly going out. i lied to my mom. and i used my friends names. hate it! sorry friends out there if i used your names. i really cant think of anymore! i really want to have my freedom. without freedom, i wont have happiness. and thats all i wanted in my life. my long term goal. after this 1yr8mth, everything turn out fine? mom found out that i still contact him. cuz dat time i used her fone to sms him with sweet talks? and she question me. omg. hate it. hate someone questioning you and you're guilty about it. and all i just say is 'hanna hanna. okokokokok.' and occasionally she will just pop out the question 'do you still contact with that stupid jl?' i felt so. Scared? all of the sudden. and i just lie again 'no.' argh! sigh. really wish to break this barrier in my life and heck everything? i dont know. i can do anything as long i get my freedom. i don't understand why my parents have to do this to me. am i looks or sound unsensible and innocent to them? and those kind of kid who knows nuts and like TOO YOUNG for anything? shucks. i wanna let them see the real me. the real shp that i really am. sigh. betty, all the best kie? dont give up! good luck =)with all the support from me and ur galfriends and especially your belove dear, you be able to solve this out. got time we murder our parents k? haha! yea... =)~
ok. no time for this. man. this sucks. i hate my life because of this. well, talk about today. having my geog p1. only 1.25hrs? what the hell. budden as i mention those peeps out there treat me a movie. and after that, mark,medik and i went around CS to window shop? lol. look at bras? haha! mark horny! =x went around every corner of metro. and around 2+ i went to dd house again. i dont know whats with me. i feel so sad all of the sudden. i threw temper at him. threw him stuff on the floor. like mad? he scolded me. i cry. cry alot. don't know why. becoming a retard. biting my hands. playing stuff without any reason like those retards out there. (opps.) and staring outside the window. wishing to jump down. argh. but he came to me,hug me and pull me away from the window. like as if dont wanna let me go.. sigh. he melt my heart. and i stop this retard nonsensical stuff.and then.. erm.. having fun? probably. and sleep from 5-7pm. still very tired. budden he gotta go katong to meet his mom. so went back myself. and reached home around 8pm+. and rot infront of the pc. :| yea and i think thats all? this post is long. dont wanna be too 'lor sor'. ciaos.