** Thursday, May 20, 2004 __
Currently Feeling*
Currently Feeling* depressed.
ya. my depression in me have not subside yet. feeling heavy in my heart. sigh. i realised that im a true sadist when i discovered lots of sad post in my blog. almost everyday? and surprise that i blog at this time? i suppose to be in school now. but i skipped classes because i feel very sad last night and think that i unable to go to school the next day. im right. its still in me. maybe i would wanna use the most immature way to solve it by being a Anti-Socialist like what medik used think. i can be easily be a anti-socialist. im sort of a loner. but not really. not to that critical stage. i mean i CAN BE one. i woke up around 11am plus. i realised its the next day. i made lots of dreams. i can't remember whats that. the only stuff i could think is HIM. i remembered last night i wanna chat with him but he wasn't there? and i doze off or something. and someone go log off my computer. but it's still on. only all programs shutdown. whos the one? must be my mom. oh yea. i can read the message history. almost forget it have that function. haha. *scanning* what the shit? the conversation is last last last night? wheres last night's? argh darn it. this suck. the whole world suck including him from now on. and tomorrow til next tue i unable to see him. and after he's back i having intensive chinese lesson. and ARGH? 2nd june is his frien's birthday and he probably staying overnight for 1 day. fuck. hate this. REAL HATE THIS. WHY? SIGH!!!. i dont care anymore. i just wanna be a sadist already. school for 2 weeks during june. ARGH. HATE THE WORLD. REALLY!.
ya. my depression in me have not subside yet. feeling heavy in my heart. sigh. i realised that im a true sadist when i discovered lots of sad post in my blog. almost everyday? and surprise that i blog at this time? i suppose to be in school now. but i skipped classes because i feel very sad last night and think that i unable to go to school the next day. im right. its still in me. maybe i would wanna use the most immature way to solve it by being a Anti-Socialist like what medik used think. i can be easily be a anti-socialist. im sort of a loner. but not really. not to that critical stage. i mean i CAN BE one. i woke up around 11am plus. i realised its the next day. i made lots of dreams. i can't remember whats that. the only stuff i could think is HIM. i remembered last night i wanna chat with him but he wasn't there? and i doze off or something. and someone go log off my computer. but it's still on. only all programs shutdown. whos the one? must be my mom. oh yea. i can read the message history. almost forget it have that function. haha. *scanning* what the shit? the conversation is last last last night? wheres last night's? argh darn it. this suck. the whole world suck including him from now on. and tomorrow til next tue i unable to see him. and after he's back i having intensive chinese lesson. and ARGH? 2nd june is his frien's birthday and he probably staying overnight for 1 day. fuck. hate this. REAL HATE THIS. WHY? SIGH!!!. i dont care anymore. i just wanna be a sadist already. school for 2 weeks during june. ARGH. HATE THE WORLD. REALLY!.