** Tuesday, March 09, 2004 __
Currently Feeling*
moodless
fuk. kinda envy those guys out there which i just seen their blogs. really. life is so great to them. but me? stuck at home getting lots of sickness which it comes to me out of the blue, and my money is getting lesser and lesser. it seemed that my luck goes. WAYYYYY DOWN. yes. im broke. damn broke. no money at all. i dun have a single cent. shyt man. sighs. even my mom going for an operation in next few weeks, nobody gonna take care of my grandma. sis going to china next week. gonna be alone at home. but having school next week. and damn moody these days. maybe gonna pms. hais. really. i dunno whats going on. a real financial problem here. everyweek paying money for MY medical fees, O lvl fees unable to pay cuz my mom DONT have the money. and gonna borrrow from my sis but it says it deduct from the account at april. so gotta wait for my dad to come back from china and sigh that form. sighs. even mom worries about her debts. 10k+! even more! it seemed that this debt has been there for.. more than 5years? it remain at the same value. mom couldnt pay it. and its worst now. her operation.. deduct here and there. making everything worst. grandma have to go doctor frequently cuz of her leg problem. old le. cant blame. this is nuts man. school. sucks. i been sleeping in school. very tired. getting tired. and im SICK AND TIRED OF LIFE. hey. im trying to cool down here. but. everything is getting out of hand. totally. i need lots of stuff. but i cant be so selfish taking my parents money to buy those favourite stuff. think of that. im guilty. and the food. i eat... no chilli? wdf? i cant eat without chilli. or fried stuff. due to my gastric flu got worst, i cant eat any spicy stuff. man! this is sucks. i hate this. looking at the people around me. i realise the importance of saving money. i realise how life is so hard and bad without money. and the financial burden at home. i understand how they feels. the jealousy. the envy that filled in the heart. and the happiness that you felt for them. but. you cant have your dreams fulfilled. sighs. really damn sad. im getting sensitive. its ok to say something funny on me. but. dun say it too seriously. im mad. VERY. maybe 10 years down the road you can see me near my house - IMH. sighs. god damn it. i really want those stuff in my wishlist. wdf. but the temptation. and the barrier of 'Saving Money/Please dont waste your money' stop me. argh. crazyy! omg. hate my life. really. damn sucks. if you were me in my shoes, i bet u already suicide. but suicide is a crime. yea. im not that stupid to end my life so early. i dont wanna die of a virgin! hmm.. yea. this phrase. medick said that! love her man. and oh ya. i forgot HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU MY BELOVE MEDICK! love her man.. really. muacks. hehe. love her more than myself.? hur. anyway. gotta do my homework and TRY to study. I hope. =(
fuk. kinda envy those guys out there which i just seen their blogs. really. life is so great to them. but me? stuck at home getting lots of sickness which it comes to me out of the blue, and my money is getting lesser and lesser. it seemed that my luck goes. WAYYYYY DOWN. yes. im broke. damn broke. no money at all. i dun have a single cent. shyt man. sighs. even my mom going for an operation in next few weeks, nobody gonna take care of my grandma. sis going to china next week. gonna be alone at home. but having school next week. and damn moody these days. maybe gonna pms. hais. really. i dunno whats going on. a real financial problem here. everyweek paying money for MY medical fees, O lvl fees unable to pay cuz my mom DONT have the money. and gonna borrrow from my sis but it says it deduct from the account at april. so gotta wait for my dad to come back from china and sigh that form. sighs. even mom worries about her debts. 10k+! even more! it seemed that this debt has been there for.. more than 5years? it remain at the same value. mom couldnt pay it. and its worst now. her operation.. deduct here and there. making everything worst. grandma have to go doctor frequently cuz of her leg problem. old le. cant blame. this is nuts man. school. sucks. i been sleeping in school. very tired. getting tired. and im SICK AND TIRED OF LIFE. hey. im trying to cool down here. but. everything is getting out of hand. totally. i need lots of stuff. but i cant be so selfish taking my parents money to buy those favourite stuff. think of that. im guilty. and the food. i eat... no chilli? wdf? i cant eat without chilli. or fried stuff. due to my gastric flu got worst, i cant eat any spicy stuff. man! this is sucks. i hate this. looking at the people around me. i realise the importance of saving money. i realise how life is so hard and bad without money. and the financial burden at home. i understand how they feels. the jealousy. the envy that filled in the heart. and the happiness that you felt for them. but. you cant have your dreams fulfilled. sighs. really damn sad. im getting sensitive. its ok to say something funny on me. but. dun say it too seriously. im mad. VERY. maybe 10 years down the road you can see me near my house - IMH. sighs. god damn it. i really want those stuff in my wishlist. wdf. but the temptation. and the barrier of 'Saving Money/Please dont waste your money' stop me. argh. crazyy! omg. hate my life. really. damn sucks. if you were me in my shoes, i bet u already suicide. but suicide is a crime. yea. im not that stupid to end my life so early. i dont wanna die of a virgin! hmm.. yea. this phrase. medick said that! love her man. and oh ya. i forgot HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU MY BELOVE MEDICK! love her man.. really. muacks. hehe. love her more than myself.? hur. anyway. gotta do my homework and TRY to study. I hope. =(